Dear Mr Bug,
It has come to my attention that a problem has emerged with regard to your application, dated 4th April 1917, for exit and entry visas plus a residency permit beyond the borders of of the Habsburg Empire. As you will be aware we cannot take in any old riffraff. In particular there is concern about those who have yet to fully embrace our glorious vision of the Big Society liberated by the efficiencies of the Market. In the circumstances I am advised by senior officials from the Ministry of National Security that it would be to everybody's advantage if at this very minute you walk directly to Platform 7, make your identity known to the impeccably uniformed official with a blue carnation in his buttonhole who will escort you to the waiting train. He will make sure you are safely and securely on board this special train which will whisk you directly to Milwaukee. There will be no stops, no food and no, what shall I say, conveniences, but I will hasten to add that the journey will take little more than two weeks, so your inconveniences should be fairly minimal. On arrival you will be met and escorted to a pleasant retirement home where you will be able to do almost anything (or nothing). We do have your every interest in mind.
I realise this opportunity is not exactly what you had in mind but you must appreciate that your recent (and not so recent) activities, no doubt based on authentically held beliefs, but, on the other hand, counter to our entrepreuneurial wonderland of value based magical thinking. This obviously necessitates us taking a firm line with misguided and faulty reasoned perversions of the true way of the Market as the only way to a better life. A second issue is that we have followed with some alarm the dangerous elements that you mix with. Your dubious associations have been fully investigated and make your safe exit more urgent. In particular you should sever all contact with a certain Wally B.
Never doubt for a moment that we know what is best for you. As you can tell this comes from the highest level of Her Majesty's Government,
Yours sincerely
(signed) Pinky (Dave) Camiknickers